[color=blue:bff4222b67]Q. What is Dr Alan Greenspan's Favorite PC Game? A. Roller Coaster Tycoon Q. Why is the fall in the StockMarket not so bad? A. It won't be so hard to keep up with the Dow Joneses. You know Greenspan's been around Sooooo long he remembers the tulip bubble! [/color] [color=green:bff4222b67]STOCK: A magical piece of paper that is worth $33.75 until the moment you buy it. It will then be worth $8.50. BOND: What you had with your spouse until you pawned his/her golf clubs to invest in Amazon.com. BROKER: The person you trust to help you make major financial decisions. Please note the first five letters of this word spell Broke. BEAR: What your trade account and wallet will be when you take a flyer on that hot stock tip your secretary gave you. BULL: What your broker uses to explain why your mutual funds tanked during the last quarter. MARGIN: Where you scribble the latest quotes when you're supposed to be listening to your manager's presentation. SHORT POSITION: A type of trade where, in theory, a person sells stocks he doesn't actually own. Since this also only ever works in theory, a short position is what a person usually ends up being in (i.e. "The rent, sir? Hahaha, well, I'm a little short this month."). COMMISSION: The only reliable way to make money on the stock market, which is why your broker charges you one. YAK: What you do into a pail when you discover your stocks have plunged and your broker is making a margin call.[/color] [color=orange:bff4222b67]What's the difference between buying a lottery ticket and buying a penny stock? In the first case, you help finance the local community swimming pool In the second case, you help finance the stock promoters' home pool. [/color]

OMG!!! poor kitty! and no wonder my cat doesn't like the ceiling fans!

SOrbone Univesrity days.... when it was... 20 years ago? I think about get some good degree but I have no idea what college to choose! I want to became stock broker or work in Brokargage firm for a while before I open my own securities agency. I have some idea about it...but that is require good education? What you guys think about school? Sorbone University? or anyother? #-o :?:

Patrick you are from French? English is your second language right? #-o

It a Friday, It not my turn but I want to give a joke:) Nuclear Power: Two strangers are sitting in adjacent seats on an airplane. One guy says to the other, "Let's talk. I hear that the flight will go faster if you strike a conversation with your fellow passenger." The other guy, who had just opened a book, closes it slowly, takes off his glasses and asks, "What would you like to discuss?" The first guy says, "Oh, I don't know; how about nuclear power?" The other guy says, "Okay, that could make for some pretty interesting conversation. But let me ask you a question first; a horse, a cow and a deer all eat the same stuff, but the deer excretes pellets; the cow, big patties; and the horse, clumps of dried grass. Why is that?" The first guy says, "I don't know." The other guy says, "Oh?... Well then, do you really think you're qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know crap?"

:evil: Here is one then: I want to know how did he manage to do it?!1 Regards, Bulli

I thought cartoons were for Saturday... OK... here's my early submission. :D

OUCH!!! :crylol:

What?! Wasn't that humerous? You know it's worth 25 extra points when you run the suspect over! LOL! Easily adaptable to Office Manager or Forum Administrator... Police answering machine

Ralph and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day, while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Ralph suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Ralph out. When the Director became aware of Edna's heroic act, she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable. When she went to tell Edna the news she said, "Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another patient. I have concluded that your act displays soundness of mind. [silent pause] The bad news is that Ralph, the patient you saved, hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead." Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself; I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?"